Weird things seem to happen to me. Not necessarily extreme things, just things that don't normally happen in every day life. Today was no different.
I'm going to be completely honest and put it out there that I haven't been to a dentist in over 5 years. (If you are done shaking your head in disapproval, continue on...) I know it's not healthy, but it's true. So I finally found a new dentist and went it today expecting the worse.
Everything was going along fine with my cleaning - no horrifying gasps from the hygienist, no tsks tsks about my dental habits. And then the doctor came in.
When the doctor and the hygienist start talking about your x-rays and there is a sound of confusion and wonder, one starts to get concerned. Of course my mind kicks into high gear thinking "I knew it! I knew something was horribly wrong!" The doctor starts looking into my mouth, feeling around and then asks if I have had my wisdom teeth removed. I told him I had to which I got a reply of "hmmm".
He then tells me that there is something showing up on my x-rays that is very strange. Something that looks like part of a tooth in the back of my mouth where I had my wisdom teeth removed, yet it is not attached to any bone. Just kind of free floating under the surface. Immediately my mind reverts back to the recovery room of my oral surgeon's office - 6 years ago - when I was told part of my tooth was lost and that I would need to be wheeled over to the hospital to get x-rays of my lungs taken.
Is it all making sense yet?
Yep. The missing part of my tooth has been found. Still in my mouth. Not where it belongs. Hanging out. Six years later.
Only me.
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Stars
I use Google Reader to follow blogs. It's amazing. One of my favorite features is the "star" feature. It lets me star a blog post that I want quick access to later. I star blogs that really hit home, are blog-worthy themselves, or that have information I want later. It's been a long time since I have gone through all my starred blogs and I decided it's time to share some of my latest favorites with all you wonderful people.
- Postsecret.com - This site is real, it's raw and it often breaks my heart. And it always brings me back to reality. "PostSecret is an ongoing community art project where people mail in their secrets anonymously on one side of a homemade postcard."
- Something I often take for granted
- When life seems to be taking the long way
- Things I often forget about
- A man who is truly building into his son - and I admire him for it
- What many are thinking, but often isn't heard
Monday, October 29, 2007
Alone
I have some amazing people in my life. People that I know I can turn to that will support me when life gets tough and celebrate with me when life is good. Sometimes though I find myself trying to do it all on my own.
The last few weeks have been tough. I've found myself going round and round with God - questioning decisions I've made, struggling for answers, desperate for guidance.
And I've been trying to do it all on my own.
I knew I needed to let someone in on my struggles, but for some reason I couldn't. Many times I picked up the phone to share it with someone, sometimes even getting them on the phone, only to talk about "fluff" instead. I process better when I talk with someone - to get my thoughts out. But I wasn't.
Yesterday while chatting with one of my closest friends, I opened the door ever so slightly. And she could tell I needed to talk. She more or less yanked the door open and made herself right at home.
And it was exactly what I needed.
Saturday U2's song, Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own, came on my ipod. Out of 1500 songs, it was one of the first ones while on random. I know God has been trying to tell me something. It just took me a while to listen.
The last few weeks have been tough. I've found myself going round and round with God - questioning decisions I've made, struggling for answers, desperate for guidance.
And I've been trying to do it all on my own.
I knew I needed to let someone in on my struggles, but for some reason I couldn't. Many times I picked up the phone to share it with someone, sometimes even getting them on the phone, only to talk about "fluff" instead. I process better when I talk with someone - to get my thoughts out. But I wasn't.
Yesterday while chatting with one of my closest friends, I opened the door ever so slightly. And she could tell I needed to talk. She more or less yanked the door open and made herself right at home.
And it was exactly what I needed.
Saturday U2's song, Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own, came on my ipod. Out of 1500 songs, it was one of the first ones while on random. I know God has been trying to tell me something. It just took me a while to listen.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Monday, October 22, 2007
The Things We Do...
I'm currently sitting here patiently waiting for the blue goo on my face to turn white and hinder my face from moving in any direction.
Things things we do for beauty...
Things things we do for beauty...
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Love it!
There's a blog that I have been following for a while now. Some days it's photos of objects, some days it's photos of "Chuck" the dog in strange situations, some days it's hilarious stories that quite possibly might make me fall off my chair with laughter. In this blog, the title always matters. You skip the title, you miss out. Trust me.
So today I share with you the blog that most excites me when updated - that makes my day when my Google Reader appears with a new post - that always gets read first...
dooce
Today's photograph is now one of my favorites - I give you - "Yo."
*I recommend subscribing to her blog - you then get the updates from all three categories - her thoughts, her photographs, and her photographs of her dog. If not, then at least check all three categories - so worth it!*
OH, and be warned, she can be highly sarcastic at times and occasionally crude...but always real.
So today I share with you the blog that most excites me when updated - that makes my day when my Google Reader appears with a new post - that always gets read first...
dooce
Today's photograph is now one of my favorites - I give you - "Yo."
*I recommend subscribing to her blog - you then get the updates from all three categories - her thoughts, her photographs, and her photographs of her dog. If not, then at least check all three categories - so worth it!*
OH, and be warned, she can be highly sarcastic at times and occasionally crude...but always real.
Monday, October 15, 2007
Thoughts Before Bed
- I realized this weekend that I should probably wash my winter coat before the really cold weather arrived so I would be prepared. This bothered me greatly. I'm not ready for winter.
- I love the smells of fall.
- I will go out of my way to step on a crunchy leaf.
- I'm tired of contacts - lasik would be amazing.
- Papa Vino's is amazing but just sits in your stomach for hours afterwards.
- You never know when, using who or how God might answer a prayer. Always keep your eyes and mind open.
- I actually sat down and read a whole book this weekend. It was nice, I miss doing that.
- Tonight I kept thinking it was Tuesday. I have no reason to think it was Tuesday. It just felt like a Tuesday I guess.
- I absolutely love working on in the mornings. If you would have told me 4 weeks ago that I would say that, I would laugh in your face. Now any other time to work out seems lacking to me.
- This morning I regretted cutting my hair off - I really wanted to put it in a ponytail and be lazy. A perfect example of why I decided to cut it all off.
- Starbucks is really smart - give away free itunes everyday. GENIUS!
- I love the flavors of fall beverages.
- Why is it that when I finally start getting a nice shape to parts of my body, the cold season comes and it will be completely unnoticeable due to all the layers and heavy clothes I will be wearing?!
- Sometimes its good to look back to see how far you've come, and sometimes it's good to look ahead to where you are going - but too much of either can be a bad thing.
- I could lock myself away for a year with nothing to do but read, and STILL not run out of books I haven't finished or even opened.
- I still buy more books though.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
Feeling Violated
We have a door that leads out of the garage and into the backyard. With the renovations on our house, that door has gotten an extremely large amount of use lately and it wasn't a very good door to begin with.
Last night when we went to shut it, we noticed that it wasn't lining up right. It wouldn't shut, and pieces of the trim around it were coming off. The extra padlock wouldn't line up either. We started to wonder if someone had tried to break in. It's been obvious to people driving by that we are having work done on our house - and often times that leads to break-ins, and trying to steal the expensive tools used with any remodeling project.
While I was trying to keep a level head and think logically, a part of me did start to wonder "What if..."
About an hour later my mom called to me again - the construction guys put up plywood to block off the remodeling room from the rest of the house. My mom noticed that a piece of trim that the plywood was attached to was missing and pieces of the plywood had littered the floor.
Odd I thought. But it wasn't until we thought further that we started to question how nothing seemed to fit - the door, the plywood. The guys hadn't been working on our house that day, and we assumed they had taken their tools out of the garage, but it just seemed kind of suspicious. Thankfully we called the guy doing the work and found out that yes, they had the tools and that most likely his co-worker had come by and decided to remove the plywood only to reach resistance.
Even though we are pretty positive no one was in our house that didn't belong, that still didn't keep me from feeling violated. The thought, even though brief, of someone else in my house really bothered me. And made me question how secure I feel in my own home. Kinda funny how something that never happened, can make you feel completely uncomfortable.
Needless to say, the door is getting fixed as we speak - that is if the workmen can get through all our baricades to make sure it kept unwanted people out last night. Yep, we're nothing if not resourceful.
Last night when we went to shut it, we noticed that it wasn't lining up right. It wouldn't shut, and pieces of the trim around it were coming off. The extra padlock wouldn't line up either. We started to wonder if someone had tried to break in. It's been obvious to people driving by that we are having work done on our house - and often times that leads to break-ins, and trying to steal the expensive tools used with any remodeling project.
While I was trying to keep a level head and think logically, a part of me did start to wonder "What if..."
About an hour later my mom called to me again - the construction guys put up plywood to block off the remodeling room from the rest of the house. My mom noticed that a piece of trim that the plywood was attached to was missing and pieces of the plywood had littered the floor.
Odd I thought. But it wasn't until we thought further that we started to question how nothing seemed to fit - the door, the plywood. The guys hadn't been working on our house that day, and we assumed they had taken their tools out of the garage, but it just seemed kind of suspicious. Thankfully we called the guy doing the work and found out that yes, they had the tools and that most likely his co-worker had come by and decided to remove the plywood only to reach resistance.
Even though we are pretty positive no one was in our house that didn't belong, that still didn't keep me from feeling violated. The thought, even though brief, of someone else in my house really bothered me. And made me question how secure I feel in my own home. Kinda funny how something that never happened, can make you feel completely uncomfortable.
Needless to say, the door is getting fixed as we speak - that is if the workmen can get through all our baricades to make sure it kept unwanted people out last night. Yep, we're nothing if not resourceful.
Friday, October 05, 2007
A Little Too Close...
Last night in the car I heard a song that hit a little too close to home.
I have a hard time letting others be strong for me. I haven't always been like this, but like with so many life lessons, comes baggage as well. And trusting others to hold me up when I am on the brink of breaking down is something I don't do. There have been a few people I am close to who have not only gained my trust, but have been strong enough for me to feel as if I can be weak. When I heard this song it served as a reminder that I not only need to let others be strong for me, but I need to trust that they will catch me when I finally do fall apart.
Fall by Clay Walker
Hold up there you go again
Puttin on that smile again
Even though I know you’ve had a bad day
Doin this and doin that
Always puttin’ yourself last
A whole lotta give and not enough take
But you can only be strong so long before you break…
So fall go on and fall apart
Fall into these arms of mine
Ill catch you every time you fall
Go on and lose it all
Every doubt every fear every worry every tear
Im right here
Baby fall
Forget about the world tonight
All that’s wrong and all that’s right
Lay your head on my shoulder let it fade away
And if you wanna let go baby its okay
Fall go on and fall apart
Fall into these arms of mine
Ill catch you every time you fall
Go on and lose it all
Every doubt, every fear, every worry, every tear
Im right here
Baby fall
Hold on hold on hold on to me...
Fall go on and fall apart
Fall into these arms of mine
Ill catch you every time you fall
Go on and lose it all
Every doubt, every fear, every worry, every tear
Im right here
Baby fall
I have a hard time letting others be strong for me. I haven't always been like this, but like with so many life lessons, comes baggage as well. And trusting others to hold me up when I am on the brink of breaking down is something I don't do. There have been a few people I am close to who have not only gained my trust, but have been strong enough for me to feel as if I can be weak. When I heard this song it served as a reminder that I not only need to let others be strong for me, but I need to trust that they will catch me when I finally do fall apart.
Fall by Clay Walker
Hold up there you go again
Puttin on that smile again
Even though I know you’ve had a bad day
Doin this and doin that
Always puttin’ yourself last
A whole lotta give and not enough take
But you can only be strong so long before you break…
So fall go on and fall apart
Fall into these arms of mine
Ill catch you every time you fall
Go on and lose it all
Every doubt every fear every worry every tear
Im right here
Baby fall
Forget about the world tonight
All that’s wrong and all that’s right
Lay your head on my shoulder let it fade away
And if you wanna let go baby its okay
Fall go on and fall apart
Fall into these arms of mine
Ill catch you every time you fall
Go on and lose it all
Every doubt, every fear, every worry, every tear
Im right here
Baby fall
Hold on hold on hold on to me...
Fall go on and fall apart
Fall into these arms of mine
Ill catch you every time you fall
Go on and lose it all
Every doubt, every fear, every worry, every tear
Im right here
Baby fall
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
Thoughts while baking...
• I am so blessed to have a mom that was patient enough to let me help bake as a young child. I can’t remember a time I didn’t know how to bake and through the years I have grown to love baking.
• I am so blessed to have a dad that was patient enough to teach me how to use tools, how to paint and basic common sense in a construction environment. How easy it would have been, as well as faster, to have done it all himself. But he took the time to instill those things where they have stayed through the years.
• I hope when I have kids I never lose perspective on what is important. I like to find the most efficient way possible to get something done, and I hope I will remember to take the extra time to build those memories with my children.
• I’ve been doing a lot of processing and thinking lately. Mostly about “big” life issues. God’s been doing some work in me.
• Some of that thinking has been on the topic of “fear”. I feel like as soon as I deal with one fear, and have it somewhat under control, another fear gets presented to me. I guess when you avoid or run from the things that frighten you the most to deal with, they always come back around. Those are the times I get walloped over the head with them. So much so that I can’t avoid them.
• I wonder if I will ever learn to just deal with my fears from the get-go.
• I have some amazing people in my life. Last week when I was tired and exhausted all I had to look around and see people around me holding me up, supporting me and encouraging me. It meant more than words could ever express.
• I am so blessed to have a dad that was patient enough to teach me how to use tools, how to paint and basic common sense in a construction environment. How easy it would have been, as well as faster, to have done it all himself. But he took the time to instill those things where they have stayed through the years.
• I hope when I have kids I never lose perspective on what is important. I like to find the most efficient way possible to get something done, and I hope I will remember to take the extra time to build those memories with my children.
• I’ve been doing a lot of processing and thinking lately. Mostly about “big” life issues. God’s been doing some work in me.
• Some of that thinking has been on the topic of “fear”. I feel like as soon as I deal with one fear, and have it somewhat under control, another fear gets presented to me. I guess when you avoid or run from the things that frighten you the most to deal with, they always come back around. Those are the times I get walloped over the head with them. So much so that I can’t avoid them.
• I wonder if I will ever learn to just deal with my fears from the get-go.
• I have some amazing people in my life. Last week when I was tired and exhausted all I had to look around and see people around me holding me up, supporting me and encouraging me. It meant more than words could ever express.
Monday, October 01, 2007
Much Needed....
Saturday night after church a group of us hit up Wine Down for Becca's birthday. Few of you know how I feel about Wine Down. I absolutely love it! It's a fun, kinda "chill" environment with amazing food and a wine I actually like! Granted, Saturday night I decided against having a glass of wine with dinner - after many exhausting days, and not as much sleep as I require, I knew wine would make me too sleepy to drive home or to enjoy dinner for that matter. So I settled for a sip of my favorite from a friend's glass. While it isn't a cheap place to eat, the food is amazing! Try it sometime...trust me...
The Birthday Girl, Becca, and cute Steph!
Some of the girlies hanging at Wine Down.
Amazing Mac and Cheese!! Yum!
I'm so tired and ready to go to bed at this point!
More fun pictures while waiting for our yummy food!
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